How are you feeling?

By Casey Cheah, 18 March 2020

How are you feeling?

How are you feeling? This question can make the world of difference to someone, including me! This morning a friend reached out and asked, ‘how are you feeling Case? I’ve been thinking of you!

I cannot tell you how much that meant to me. It literally brought me to tears.

Then a family relative messaged and asked the same thing, ‘how are you feeling, Case? Are you holding up ok?’ Again, tears. And then the tears continued, pretty much all day.

How are you feeling?

Today, I have been inundated with kindness and generosity. A yoga student gave me a beautiful gift in class. I reached out to my sister and we supported each other through open conversation. Friends have been messaging to ask how I am. And I in return, have been reaching out to friends and family to check in and see how they’re feeling.

Supporting each other is so important

I can’t over-emphasise the importance of those 4 simple words: ‘how are you feeling?’ As a leader in the wellbeing industry, I feel the pressure of being seen as holding it together. To remain calm and grounded, and having the answers to challenging questions in this chaotic time we find ourselves in. In reality, I am human. I have emotions. And today, I really let myself feel. I won’t lie – it felt bloody awful at times! But there were also so many moments today that really touched my heart. I shed tears not out of fear and uncertainty, but for the love that can come from this situation.

Don’t be afraid to feel

No matter who you are, don’t be afraid to let yourself feel. To friends and family, instead of offering solutions to problems, or give advice on what to do in this complex situation, try instead to sit quietly and just listen. You never know what is going on through someone’s mind and heart.

Ask, how are you feeling? Then listen

In times of crises, it is even more important to practice active listening. Listen without judgement, and instead open your hearts with compassion, understanding and love. Allow people to feel, and give them space to explore their emotions without jumping in to fix the problem. Oftentimes, people just need to feel safe, feel heard and felt listened to. Most of the time, people are not necessarily asking for advice or solutions, but rather they are seeking human connection, especially in this time of literal physical isolation.

Reach out if you need support

Let’s all reach out to the people around us, and ask them how they are feeling. You never know how much someone might need to hear that. If you are struggling, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I am here. I see you. And I am here for you.

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