The 4 Agreements

By Casey Cheah, 28 July 2021

The 4 Agreements

By following The 4 Agreements, we can start to live with more compassion, kindness and love,  rather than from fear, frustration and anger. The last few weeks, especially since the latest lockdown in Melbourne and Sydney, I’ve observed and felt so much more anger, fear, panic, frustration and rage. People are reacting emotionally, physically and verbally. Not just in the form of protests and so on, but more insidiously, in the way we judge and talk badly about others.

The 4 Agreements

Recently I re-read ‘The 4 Agreements’ by Don Miguel Ruiz, and they made me reflect, especially in the context of the lockdowns we are experiencing.

1. Be impeccable with your word

This is the most powerful agreement. It is through the word, that we manifest and speak our intent into creation. The word is like a seed, and our human minds are fertile, and so we must be careful of what we say, because everything will have an energetic, psychological and emotional follow on effect.

The word ‘impeccable’ means to be ‘without sin’. If we speak badly about someone else, we are not just harming him or her, but we are also harming our Self. When we speak badly about someone, we create a negative vibration within ourselves. What we put out is what we attract back. So being impeccable with our word really means speaking our truth with kindness and compassion. It’s knowing that that is what we will experience within our Self, as well as what we are putting out there for others to feel and experience too.

2. Don’t take things personally

Nothing others do or say is because of us. We have tendency to make everything about us, but the truth is, everyone sees the world from his or her own perspective – everyone lives in their own mind. When people speak their mind, even if they speak it about or to you, it’s not about you. They are working their own thoughts and feelings out on you. The problem is when we believe them – then we swallow their energy, and make it our own.

By not taking anything personally, it gives us a huge sense of freedom! We become immune to negative comments and seemingly offensive statements, because we know that it’s never about us. Our anger, frustration, jealousy and fear will dissipate. And when we live from a place of acceptance, love and contentment within ourselves, that is the energy that we put out, and therefore will attract back into our reality.

3. Don’t make assumptions

We have all made assumptions at one point or another. We assume we know what others are doing or thinking, then we take things personally and blame them, creating disharmony with our word. We usually only see and hear the things we want to see and hear. Humans are selective, in order to protect ourselves, and to feel safe. The problem is we make assumptions that others see life as we do. And this is why often we feel we can’t be ourselves – because we think others will judge us, just they way we judge ourselves.

Unconditional love is accepting others exactly as they are, with their own thoughts, opinions and feelings, without judging them or needing them to change. In order to let go of assumptions and judgement, we need to keep asking questions, and staying curious. We need to be aware that we will never know the full story. But if we can stay open and loving, imagine what difference it would make in the world?

4. Always do your best

Always doing your best gives you peace and contentment in your mind and body. But we never want to do more or less. Doing less gives rise to feelings of self-judgement, guilt, and regret. Trying too hard and doing more can deplete our energy. Doing our best means honouring where we are at today, and respecting our inner most needs. It allows us to go to sleep at night feeling good in ourselves, living from a place of love and following the first 3 agreements as much as possible.

It is in moments such as these trying times that it can be helpful to reflect on these 4 Agreements. Check in with yourself and ask; how am I talking about others – is it with love, or is it from a place of negative emotion? Am I making assumptions about why others’ are behaving the way they are? Am I taking the actions and beliefs and opinions of others personally, and making their ideas about me? How can I do my best, given this situation we find ourselves in?

Reiki healing or Coaching support

If you feel you need support, please don’t hesitate to reach out. Learning and embodying these 4 Agreements can be helpful, but we all need support and coaching or mentoring at times. Book in for a Reiki healing or Coaching session with Melbourne Reiki and Wellness today.

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