Why You Still Feel Stuck
Why do you still feel stuck, even though you’re doing all the “right” things?
It’s one of the questions I hear most often from clients, and if I’m honest, it’s a question I’ve asked myself many times too.
Maybe you’ve read all the books, listened to the podcasts, journalled until your hand hurts, practised meditation, worked on your mindset, repeated affirmations, or seen psychologists, coaches, naturopaths, or healers.
You’re trying. You’re doing the work. So why do you still feel stuck, like something isn’t shifting?
For me, that question takes me back to one of the hardest periods of my life.
I Was Doing Everything Right
Many years ago, after a trip to Bali, I became incredibly unwell. What started as a few days of Bali Belly turned into almost three years of chronic gut issues.
I became intolerant to almost every food. My diet consisted of white rice and broccoli. I lost so much weight that I was skin and bone. My hormones were all over the place, I was exhausted, emotional, bloated, and honestly wondered whether I was losing my mind.
During those three years, I did everything I was told to do. I saw doctors, had colonoscopies and gastroscopies, and spent thousands of dollars on supplements.
I researched endlessly. Every time I saw a new doctor or specialist I hoped that person would finally be able to help me. But nothing shifted.
I wasn’t lazy, nor was I avoiding the work. I was doing everything “right.” Yet I was still stuck.
The Roots Run Deeper
Looking back now and knowing what I know, my mindset on healing has completely changed.
The problem was not that I wasn’t trying hard enough. The problem was that I was trying to solve the problem from the same place that had created it.
I was approaching everything from desperate, panicky and anxious mind. I was researching more information, seeing more doctors, taking more supplements. Reading more books, and getting completely overwhelmed, frustrated and even more exhausted.
I was still doing, doing, doing. Trying this, trying that. But healing doesn’t always happen through thinking more, and doing more. Sometimes healing happens through feeling. Through slowing down.
Through reconnecting with your body, your nervous system, and the deeper parts of yourself that your conscious mind simply can’t access on its own.
There Was A Missing Piece
Eventually, I found energy healing.
At first, I’ll admit, I was unsure. How could energy healing really help all the physical pain? The pain was tangible, my body was inflamed, and mind so overwhelmed. But something inside me knew I had to try something different.
That decision changed my life.
For the first time, a healer actually listened to me, heard what I was saying, and took the time to understand. She tuned into my body and revealed information that no doctor had ever tested for. I also finally stopped trying to force my body to heal, and instead started slowing down and listening to it.
I began understanding that symptoms weren’t the enemy. They were messengers. My body wasn’t working against me, it was trying to communicate with me.
As I continued receiving energy healing, working with incredible practitioners who could understand the link between the mind, body, and energy, and later learning Reiki myself, something remarkable began to happen.
My body softened, my nervous system settled, and my energy changed. My body returned back to balance and I could eat everything again – back to normal! It was truly unbelievable. It honestly felt like a miracle had occurred.
Healing Happens In Layers
One of the biggest misconceptions about healing is that once you find the right tool, everything changes instantly.
In my experience, healing doesn’t work like that. Healing happens in layers. You learn a lesson. You integrate it. Then life gently invites you to explore that same lesson again, but from a deeper place.
That’s exactly what has happened throughout my own journey.
Whether it’s doing too much (and burning out!), people pleasing, boundaries, self-worth, achievement, or learning to trust myself, I find the lesson keeps coming back. Not because I haven’t healed, but because I’m healing on deeper and deeper levels.
A big misconceptions about healing is that eventually you stop encountering the lesson. In my experience, that’s not what happens. The lesson keeps showing up.
The difference is that you recognise it sooner, recover faster, and respond differently.
Why We Stay Stuck
One of the biggest reasons we stay stuck is because part of us doesn’t actually want to change. That might sound strange. After all, if you’re reading this blog, chances are you desperately want things to change! And I totally get it.
But another part of you has a different job – to keep you safe. Unfortunately, safe doesn’t always mean happy! Safe means familiar, even if the familiar thing is burnout.
Safe can mean anxiety, or people pleasing, or overthinking. Each of these things was learned, developed, or even inherited, as a coping mechanism, a way to protect you and brace against potential threats.
Your nervous system would often rather choose a familiar struggle than an unfamiliar freedom, because at least with a familiar struggle it knows what to do.
That’s why healing isn’t just about changing your behaviour. It’s about helping your nervous system, mind, and body, feel safe enough to become someone new.
This Is The Work That Changes Everything
This realisation is one of the biggest reasons I’ve created my new online program.
Over the years, I’ve realised that most people don’t need more information. They already know what they “should” be doing. What they need is a witness to see them through their transformation, and to support them through a deeper understanding of themselves.
In this program, together we’ll explore the subconscious beliefs, nervous system patterns, unmet needs, and protective parts of ourselves that quietly shape the way we think, feel, and react. Because when you understand why you do what you do, everything starts to change.
You stop fighting yourself, and start to work with yourself.
And that’s where lasting transformation begins.
Maybe You’re Not Stuck At All
These days, whenever I find myself feeling stuck, I ask a different question. Not, “Why isn’t this working?” But rather, “What part of me is trying to keep me safe?”
That single question changes everything. Frustration gets replaced with curiosity and compassion, and then deeper understanding.
I now know I’m not broken or falling apart when things go wrong – I actually need to pause and sit with myself, to really see, hear and understand what’s going on beneath the surface.
I know there’s a part of me that usually needs to be acknowledged in some way, and made to feel safe enough that she can let go of holding so tightly.
That’s where the real sustainable and transformational healing finally begins 🤍
Ready To Go Deeper?
If this resonates with you, you’re going to love what I’ve created!
On Wednesday 29th July, 7.30-8.30pm I’m hosting ‘The Sovereign Self Masterclass’ FREE online. This masterclass will talk though the stress and wellness cycle, why we get so stuck all the time, and how we can actually shift for good. It brings together psychology, nervous system regulation, emotional awareness, Reiki healing, mindset, and spirituality into one practical framework.
Because understanding yourself changes everything.
Want to join? Make sure you register here. Even if you can’t attend live on the night, every person who registers will receive the replay FREE within 24 hours.
I’d love to see you there!
